1. “If I were a Meeseeks I´d stay at your side for at least three days.”
2. “Hey girl, are you a MeeSeeks? [No, why?] Because I want you to complete one simple task and then disappear.”
3. “Get Schwifty with me this Valentine´s Day.”
4. “Wanna get schwifty together?”
5. “Would you have a better relationship with me than Jerry and Beth?”
6. “Swiggity swooty can I cum on your booty?”
7. “I need you more than Rick needs Morty.”
8. “Do you watch Rick and Morty? [Works wonders if you are a girl picking up a guy.]”
9. “I need you more than Rick needs Szechwan sauce.”
10. “You’re a fine piece of ass and I can prove it mathematically.”
11. “In an infinite number of universes, I´d pick you in all of them.”
12. “Are you pirates of the pancreas? Cuz we gonna be having a shit load of legal issues after one ride.”
13. “Show me what you got under that shirt.”
14. “We gotta get naked so the Somalian space pirates can´t see us.”
15. “Are you the Rick J-19ζ7 to my Jerry? Because you look like you’ve got your priorities in order.”
16. “Show me what you got!”
17. “Are you the Rick and Morty community? Because I want to leave you on edge for a long ass time while a build up a thunderous conclusion.”
18. “Let’s get riggity riggity wrecked son!”
19. “I’ve been watching you drink [Insert her name here], I get the feeling you’ve got a hard job. I wonder what it takes to please you; that´s the job I want. Part time. Full time. I wanna be good at it, bad at it. I wanna get promoted, fired. Corner office, hostile takeover, workplace accident. I´m on my knees, [Insert her name here]. Praying, worshipping, begging. Whatever you want. What do you think about that?”
20. “I have to fulfill my purpose so I can go away!”
21. “Let´s go back to my place and re-watch all seasons of Rick & Morty 😉 ”
22. “Hey girl, did you know that Rick & Morty is the best Halloween costume? Because even if there are 30 other Rick & Mortys at the party, it makes the perfect sense.”
23. “Hey baby, let´s get naked, cuddle, eat food, and just lay in bed and watch Rick & Morty all day long.”
24. “Ooooh yeah! Can do!”
25. “Do you want to have sex with me?” [She: Over my dead body!] “It’s ok, I can just hop dimensions until I find one where you’re already dead, and we can have sex then.”
26. “Hey girl, do you want to squanch?”
27. “Hey baby, I am just a lonely Rick looking for his Morty. Will you help me find him?”
28. “BOOO! NOT COOL!”
29. “Hey, take your pants off, it’s schwifty time today!”
30. “I have a different kinda mega seed I’m gonna shove up your butthole 2nite.”
31. “Hi I´m Mr. Meeseeks! Look at meee!”
32. “Shit on the floor!”
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